Dreams

A bundle of our unconscious as a collective,

Dance with the stars in the sky as the night preys

Victims below powerless —

While lids shut, the mind opens with no limits of its stretch

The unspoken and unthought breathes and lives

The rational is irrelevant

Private smiles from private pillows

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Opinions

Opinions are funny things. Everyone differs in their beliefs, values, attitudes. There’s much debate about how opinions develop… perhaps they’re innate, perhaps they are constructed through social experiences. What I want to discuss though is how these opinions are expressed – and the spectrum of objectivity.

From experience, people sit on a continuum that ranges from indifference and nonchalance – to absolute intolerance of others having any opposing ideas to their own. I would sit somewhere up the intolerant end – I don’t suffer fools well – yet watching people stuff their criticisms of people and situations down other people’s throats really makes me uncomfortable and somewhat revolted.

For instance, the Keyboard Warriors of the world. Scrolling innocently through my Facebook feed, often a radio station page  will post a gossip story about a celebrity, eg Miley Cyrus, and it’ll invite all trolls sitting in neutral to kick into gear.. then the comments turn into the World’s Greatest Debate and everyone wants the award of having The Last Word. Why express online opinions? Those that do, one can only assume they lack control or excitement in their real lives so feel the need to hide behind their static image of a display picture to ruffle some feathers. I’m not afraid of confrontation, but I won’t actively seek it. Even if I saw something I wildly disagree with, something sexist racist or straight up derogatory, I would never comment online. Those that want to argue with you are simply looking for that – a superficial fight. Nothing you say, no matter how fiercely you say it, will affect them in any way. But then I think, should I be embracing my online opinion? This phenomenon we refer to as the Internet is the biggest platform ever created for those who wish to get up on the soap box and have a say. Pretty incredible protests and rallies have been organised by the unity of those who dare voice their points of view. Looking at the tragedies occurring in Ferguson, Missouri at the moment, it was public outcry that is causing the movement and social media would play a huge role in that.

Another important case to reflect on (especially as a New Zealander) is the Roast Busters case. Now this really rattled me, boys (they don’t deserve to be classified as men) created a Facebook group to brag about their sexual conquests and gang rape experiences with intoxicated underage women. They were not charged despite evidence. Aside from the obvious perspective most will share, what about thinking purely in terms of being allowed to have an opinion. Now they clearly had shared beliefs of what is appropriate and moral, and if you discount the illegal elements of this example, what was the difference between them having their opinion and for instance me having my own views of where moral boundaries lie? Just because our Government or our social contract has drawn these lines for us, does that mean that opinions that lie outside them should be banished? To what extreme? Opinions can hurt those who do not share them, but it is when opinions are treated as fact and turn into action, a problem ignites.

This is where I could segue into a discussion of Atheism vs. Religion but I might save that for another post. However I think it is important to at least touch on the point of this, and how opinions can hurt especially when used as a tool to judge or criticise another human being.

I guess why I wrote about this is because I have a had a fight with a friend recently because my opinion of their actions makes me see them in a new light. Upon telling them this (they asked why I had distanced myself) a roundabout conversation was had because sometimes people cannot simply agree or share an opinion. And I guess that is okay. I just wish there was a way for me to figure out how to have my opinion but ignore it to maintain the friendship. This life business is tricky.

Signed, Hannah 

For Future Me

Be unapologetic

The mistakes you make help you grow

Diversity is to be embraced

Support and be supported

Take risks and take any opportunity

Don’t be afraid to love

Don’t be quick to hate

Be curious and ask questions, knowledge is only found by those who seek it.

– Signed, Hannah

What Friends Taught Me

Friends was my childhood. I have watched every single episode at least 5 times over. When I was 10, in 2004, the last episode came out. Everywhere I went, so did my portable DVD player with my full 10 season disc sets that my Dad had gotten me overseas in Thailand. I still think Friends is the best TV show ever created; from Chandler’s awkward but witty one-liners, to Rachel’s romantic blunders with Ross.

Friends taught me the foundation of my sexual education. In ‘The One With The Cake’, Phoebe does a spontaneous reading for Emma at her 1st birthday party and begins reading “Sex and the single mother. Finding your G-spot.” Everyone in the scene reacts with rounds of “NOOOOOO!” and I was pretty stumped I must admit. I was probably around 9 years old and a thinker. I pondered this so-called “G-spot” for a while but decided there were no clues in the name. These were really the days before Google was a big thing so I did what I thought was best – I waited until I was in the car with my Mum on the way to the Supermarket and amongst the silence my squeeky voice suddenly asked “Mum, what’s a G-Spot?”. Within 0.572 seconds we had pulled over onto a taxi stand and her face read – Holy Shit. Perched on the curb of Allen Street, my mother had to explain to me that special spot. Cheers Friends.

Phoebe taught me that to have the most fun, you can’t care what others think of you. She often relays funny stories of her life from where she was homeless, using drugs, getting in street fights – though that doesn’t sound particularly funny out of context (I’m not a sadist I swear!). She runs like she did when she was a kid, arms and legs spinning out at all angles with a grin on her face, through Central Park without a care in the world. Phoebe was the one that called people on their shit. Maybe she influenced me to do the same. As I said in my previous post, I’m fairly opinionated. To add to that, my greatest drive in my opinions is injustice. Injustice makes me so mad, even in the sense where a friend will make a decision that is morally wrong, I see it as unjust and undermining to all the people that make the harder but just decisions. Phoebe taught me how to have a broader life perspective.

Joey and Chandler taught me that you can be big grown up kids at the age of 30. Watching them make forts, play Foosball, and get excited over La-Z-Boy Chairs, made me excited to grow up, not afraid. In real life, you see people walking around in suits and looking stern, yet through J&C I could see how there was so much fun to be had. They were best friends that always had each other’s backs. Their friendship taught me what I wanted to have in my own. I have a best friend now that took me years to find, but is the best ever.

Obviously, Friends couldn’t teach me everything, but it gave me some important clues to life. Even in my low moments, Friends can often bring me out of that wee slump and remind me of things that are worth being reminded of; friends, family and laughing. Everyone should make some space for Friends in their own life contract.

Signed, Hannah 

The Agreement

Hello! I am an absolute novice in terms of this blogging business, but I have decided I want to fit into this online system somewhere – outside Facebook and Instagram. I want to start a blog where I can write about what I want and gain insight about myself as a person on paper. I won’t claim to be the best writer, but I hope expression translates and my points are clear (at least occasionally).

This blog is really just for me, I want to start something and see it through. I called it the life contract because I am 20, and I’m uninspired. I have just finished my second year of university and find myself with 3 very long summer months ahead of me. This blog is a contract with myself, as I want to write down my thoughts, see a progression of them, and ultimately learn something about myself – if I can learn from others along the way that would be a bonus.

I really enjoy writing, I have started two novels with great intentions, that slowly dwindled to weak excuses. I love beauty and makeup related things – I watch a few YouTubers and read a few bloggers in that field of interest. I am a fairly opinionated person, on world issues, social issues, all the good stuff. This year I also flatted for the first time, so I had to learn to cook pretty promptly so my 4 flatmates wouldn’t suffer.

So I guess here will lie an eclectic mix of whatever is happening in my life and whatever crosses my mind to write about. I might share some passages from my novels, or a review of a product, or a rockin’ recipe. I guess we will just see, but I hereby agree to maintain this blog at least for the next three months.

Welcome to The Life Contract.

Signed, Hannah 

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